I’m a jealous lover –Belinda Effah

Pretty Belinda Effah has suddenly turned one of the most sought after faces in Nollywood. The Calabar, Cross-River State-born starlet is seemingly wanted by different top film-makers to be on their caste.

In an interview, in Lekki, Lagos, where she was getting set to shoot yet another movie entitled, ‘Autumn Leaves,’ Effah reflects on her romance with the movie industry, revealing how her patient and perseverance had brought her this far in the competitive entertainment sector.

The Kokoma star also recalled her near-rape experience, which prompted the establishment of her NGO, Belinda’s Advocacy Against Rape.

Excerpts:

Let’s get to know the real Belinda Effah, aside the characters you play on television?

Whatever people think they know about me, that’s fine. That is why I play different characters in the movie and still remain myself in reality. I’m a public figure, so whatever people think or feel like saying about me, that’s fine. My personal life is my personal life.

So you really don’t give a damn about what people say about you?

Do you expect me to start chasing people around to change their impression about me? Even if I say this is the real me, people would still say whatever they want to say.  I believe that I am a role model to whole lot of people. I’m a God-fearing person. I put God first in everything I do. That’s the real me. Other things you hear about me are false.

Have you heard or read something awful about yourself that really hurt you so bad?

I have not really heard anything or read anything bad about myself, because I guard my private life so preciously. I’m not an outgoing person, so people don’t see much of me.

Although they are lots of haters in the industry that wants to see you down by all means, I don’t really care. They can’t identify with your success; so they cook up a story to bring you down. I pity the narrow minded people that believe them, because that’s not Belinda. To me, I try not to listen to everything people say about me because it could depress you and make you feel bad. I am well orientated, focused, determined and nothing would change that about me.

However, if people keeps talking about me, that means I am relevant.

What was your growing up days like?

Growing up was actually very cool. I grew up in a very lovely environment.  My mother has always been into business, while my father was very strict. I grew up in a military environment. We couldn’t do anyhow but we learnt to be much disciplined in the process.

Were you a daddy’s girl?

I love my parents. I love them both equally, but I am my own person. I am Belinda’s girl (laughs)

What’s your position in the family?

I am the last child from my mum because I am from a polygamous family. I really enjoyed that privilege as the last child from my mum, but I wasn’t spoilt. We were all much disciplined.

At a point, you left the industry, to do take up a paid jobs. What prompted your return?

Like I said earlier, I’m a very determined person. The end determines the means. Everybody has a strategy. I started acting in 2005-2006, then along the line I got into a TV reality show. Next, it was Movie Star. I felt that platform would project me to wherever I want to go in the entertainment industry, but things didn’t turn out as I had planned. I had to put in a lot of patience, hard work and determination, but sometimes the burden of life would hit you so hard that you would be forced to sit down and reflect.

I never gave up, I just had to strategise and continue. In 2008-2009, I took the back seat, because a lot wasn’t happening and I had bills to pay. I got a day’s job but was always in tune with what was going on in the entertainment industry.  Then in 2011, the industry called me back.  And I was like ‘whew! Finally! It was God. I sat back and let God take control, although I didn’t see the grand return coming, but I believed God.

How many awards do you have now?

So far, I have seven awards to my credit. I won AMAA, BON, GIAMA, AMVCA, and lots more.

What inspires you?

I would say ultimately, it has been God. I’m a very spiritual person. And I believe it was my calling to be an actress. He guides me and orders my steps on how and where I should be.

Then I also draw inspiration from the people around me, my environment, the things I see and lots more.

You have been sounding very spiritual. Does this also affect the kind of roles you play?

I’m an actress, so that I’m spiritual doesn’t mean I can’t kiss in movies. If it’s a good story, then why won’t I kiss to tell the story well? The character might start as a bad person who later turned good. That’s a good story line. Everything or everyone mustn’t come out clean.

As long as someone is employing me to play a role, because they know I can do the job, then people expects me to turn the job down because I am spiritual? In this industry that once you reject a job, thousands others are willing to grab it. I also have to show my professionalism.

Some doctors have to do something to protect their career, but they can’t come out and say it. But all eyes are on actors, people judge every move we make.

Sorry to disappoint you people, if I have to kiss in a movie, I’ll do it well because I am a professional. I can kiss, but I can’t do nudity because that’s like the extreme.

Nudity? What if the pay is enticing?

I can’t do nudity that is the extreme. Semi-nude or nudity is a No! No!

Can you remember when you had your first kiss?

I can’t remember, because I don’t think it was significant.

But you have a boyfriend now?

It is my personal life and I don’t want to talk about it.

You are public figure, so your fans would want to know a little bit about you, Are you engaged?

I’m not engaged. Let’s leave it at that.

Would you say you are a jealous lover?

Everybody has this iota of jealous inside them. So if you say you don’t, then I doubt if you are a human being. I guess I do, but with time, I have learnt how to control it.

How far would you go to protect your relationship?

I’ll only be in a relationship with a matured mind, who knows the kind of job I do and understand me well. We would have mutual respect for each other. Whatever happens, I’ll always respect my partner and whatever issues we have, we settle it indoors.

Aside maturity, what else do you look out for in your ideal man?

God-fearing, disciplined, well-dressed, clean (mental, spiritually and emotionally clean). I can’t stand dirty environments or dirty people.

Is that all? How about the size of his pockets?

Well, I would rather go for a man with potentials, but if you have the money already, that’s an addition. I am hardworking person and I believe that as a team, we would make it. I don’t want a lazy person.

Is Belinda Effah romantic?

(Laughs). I don’t know that about myself. Maybe I am, maybe I am not, I don’t really know. But I can play the role of a very romantic person in movies.

Where would you rather be with your partner for the sake of love?

Anywhere, even in the bush. I would do something creative as long it is just the two of us (laughs).  If you are with someone that you truly love, you wouldn’t really care about anything else. Love is about the little things you do, those little sacrifices you make for your partner.

What else does love mean to you?

Love is God. He sent His only begotten Son to die for us. That is the essence of true love.

Let’s keep the spiritual aspect of love aside, to you as human being?

We have to start from the spiritual aspect first. Love is more about sacrifice. And most times, people misuse the context of love.  They thought it’s all about feelings. Love takes a lot of maturity. So when next you say you are in love, think about it very well.

Have you been heartbroken and how did you cope with the feeling?

Heartbreak happens every day, so you just have to be very careful about who you open up to. Sometimes, two people are not meant to be, you just have to break up amicably. Before you date a guy, you have to know him well, be his friend, and know if you can trust the person with 100 percent of your love. A lot of people make the mistake of opening up to the wrong person and it affected them so bad, because after they break-up, lots of shit happens.

So you are saying, you are still in good terms with all your ex? 

Yes! In most cases.

Aside acting, what other business are you involved in?

I am into food business. I love food. I’m from Calabar in Cross-River State. We are known for good food. So I started packaging dried Afang leaves for sale.  Then bottled palm oil. I also have a pet project called Belinda’s Advocacy Against Rape. But I am yet to push it further because of work. I am in partnership with project alert. They are in-charge of violence against women. I hope to pick it again soon.

Have you been a victim of rape?

No! I haven’t. But I have come very close to being raped. I thank God, he didn’t succeed. It was back then in school, some guy wanted to corner me.  School was just resuming, few students were around. It was a tussle, he was trying to pull me into his room to sexually molest me, but I held onto the pole that was there. I didn’t know how I got the energy to hold onto it so strong before I took to my heels. It was just the grace of God.  If he had gotten me into that room, hmmmm, it would have been brutal.

What’s your take on the actresses who are forming cliques?

Well, I don’t know of such. I am good with everybody. I don’t work with restricted people. I am just me.

Who are your role models?

I have really being inspired by the likes of Olu Jacob, RMD, Genevieve, Mercy Johnson, Uche Jombo, Ini Edo, and lots of them. They motivated me to act. Majid Michel, Emem Isong, Desmond Elliot, all those I grew up watching on TV. They all have a story to tell for people to learn from.

If you are to go a lunch date with two actors, who would be your pick?

I would rather pick RMD and Desmond Elliot. They are my favorite actors. Also because they have been very successful in their trades and very outstanding. I’ll like to learn their secrets and add it to mine.

If you have a chance, what would you change about yourself?

I believe God created us all the way we are for a reason. But I’m given a chance to ask for me, maybe I’ll ask for more intelligence, to be closer to God, more fervent with God.

As for myself, my physical self, I love the way I am. Although, when I was much younger, I wanted bigger boobs, but as I grow older, I found that bigger boobs dent really make you prettier. It is just about yourself carriage. I am going to leverage with what I have.

What’s your philosophy of life?

Be the best person you can be, because the you in you, makes you who you are.

What’s your fashion style?

Belinda loves to create a style, I don’t go with the trend. I like to be comfortable in my skin and my mood determines the dresses I wear. I dress how I feel. I like infusing my own style into whatever dress I see and admire.

Why have you decided to be on natural hair?

That’s because that’s how God created me. Should I question God for giving me such a beautiful natural hair? I’m always going to be natural. I can weave, fix my hair, but my hair remains natural. I just want to be able to style my natural hair.

Favourite colour?

I like red. I play with it a lot.